ANTM Puppet Doll Photos
Shihrah: Princess of Powertubing weighs in on last night’s episode of America’s Next Top Model episode "The Girl Who Has Surgery" — Every season on ANTM, there is a moment that I like to think of as the Uh-Oh moment. By this, I mean that there is usually a moment when one of the girls stands up and says, “No, I will not do it. I won’t and you can’t make me, Tyra.” That’s when you think, “Uh-Oh. She’s going home.” And she usually does. Remember cycle one when blond sweetheart Shannon and Bible-toting Robin both refused to strip down and get covered in axle grease for the diamonds photo shoot in the Paris Buddha Bar? Remember cycle five, when beauty queen Cassandra wouldn’t trade her long locks for the modern-day pixie Tyra envisioned on her? When you think about it, the Uh-Oh moment almost always happens in connection with cutting hair or taking off clothes, but this season, we have something new thrown into the mix. Here’s my question: are teeth the new hair? The new nudity?
This week, the girls engage in some good, clean fun at the dentist’s office. Most of the girls are there just for a routine whitening session so that they, too, can have unnaturally sparkling white teeth to go with their unnaturally long thin legs and unnaturally long shiny hair. Joanie and Danielle, however, are in for something slightly more drastic (and for our viewing pleasure) much, much more painful. Danielle is offered the chance to get rid of the big gap between her two front teeth, but takes a firm stand that The Gap stays. Danielle loves The Gap. The Gap is part of who she is. I don’t love The Gap and think that The Gap, when taken together with her hangin-in-the-hood accent, makes Danielle seem on first impression (and first impressions, we all know, is what really counts in modeling) like a much less classy girl than we all know she actually is. I don’t love The Gap, but I love that Danielle loves it, and if Danielle wants it to stay, then I want it to stay too. And quite frankly, this little incident kinda makes me love Danielle. (continued after the jump)
(continued before the jump) Joanie, on the other hand, is offered the chance to get rid of her snaggletooth, which has already been brought up as an issue in several judging sessions. No moral dilemma here – she jumps at the chance to correct her hillbilly teeth (her words, not mine). Poor girl ends up getting two teeth pulled (on camera!) and 12 teeth “ground down to pencil point” so that all her front teeth can be capped with fake pearly whites. Whole process takes 2 days (first day pulling/grinding session lasts a full 12 hours) and an awful lot of camera time. End result really does look amazing though. And you really have to hand it to Joanie – even though she is exhausted from getting home from the dentist’s at 5 am (and in incredible pain), she manages to pull off two amazing pictures from both the model-cum-doll and Tyra-made-me-cry photo shoots this week.
At judging, Danielle’s decision not to have her teeth changed really comes under fire from the judges, who tell her in no uncertain terms that she can’t be an ANTM with a Cover Girl contract, and keep The Gap around too. On the one hand, I get the point that having a big gap between your two front teeth can make you a less versatile and hirable model, especially if you want to model for Cover Girl. On the other hand, how many people told Lauren Hutton to get rid of her gap? And how many more told Cindy Crawford to get rid of her mole? And really, hasn’t Danielle turned in a series of amazing pictures so far (Snow Black? Marionette Doll?), even with The Gap?
In the end though, its Jade and Brooke who end up on the chopping block. Brooke is up for her usual “hasn’t taken a single good picture even though she has such a beautiful and interesting and offbeat face” problem. Jade is up for being phony at judging and getting caught out by the judges. Jade actually won this week’s challenge for being the most immune to harsh criticism doled out by the mean actress-pretending-to-be-model-booker. As a reward, she got to have her mom pop out of a big box and stay with her for a couple days, which, according to the other girls, really let everyone see a new softer, warmer side to Jade. During judging, Jade tries to show this newly vulnerable side to the judges too, by tearing up and trying to talk about her emotions when the judges critique her crying picture. Judges aren’t buying the uncharacteristic display of emotion, and Nigel points out that many of the girls seemed to be rolling their eyes when Jade was crying. Haha. Tyra calls Jade “somebody that was very fake”. Ouch. Unfortunately, it’s Brooke who ends up getting the boot. Even though I can’t really be on Brooke’s side after her “go back to Africa” comment to Nnenna last week, and I don’t think she takes good pictures, I really would have rather seen Jade go away.
NEXT WEEK :: Danielle is back at the dentist. Will she or won’t she???? (I think she will, though I wish she wouldn’t). Weigh in with your thoughts!!!!