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Jon Stewart Jokes About Angelina Jolie

Jon Stewart Jokes About Angelina Jolie

During one of his monologues, host Jon Stewart poked fun of pregnant Angelina Jolie.

He said, “Earlier, I mentioned there were two very famous quite pregnant actresses here tonight. Actually, I was incorrect. I’ve become aware that there’s a third. Jessica Alba is pregnant, Cate Blanchett is pregnant and Nicole Kidman is pregnant.” (Nic wasn’t in her seat, so they flashed a still image of her. She was there was on the merlot carpet, though.)

Continuing his joke, Jon gave out an imaginary Oscar: “The baby goes to…. (drumroll) Angelina Jolie. On my god, Angelina Jolie. I’m just stunned. It goes to Angelina Jolie. That’s terrific. Obviously Angelina couldn’t be with us tonight–it’s tough to get 17 babysitters on Oscars night. I’ll accept this baby on her behalf.”

Watch the video of Jon Stewart joking about Angelina Jolie here.

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Photos: Axelle/Bauergriffinonline.com, ABC
Posted to: Angelina Jolie, Jon Stewart, Oscars 2008

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  • WompWomp

    It took CLINIQUA all that time to write that? CLINIQUA you got b*tchslapped by jill & Julianne and you b*tchslapped yourself again with that pathetic comeback. You dont “insulting Maniston on occasion” you LOVE her name and cant keep it out your mouth.

  • Jill

    Mr and Mrs Smith @ 02/25/2008 at 12:49 am
    CLINIQUA @ 02/25/2008 at 12:36 am
    ___________________________________
    Oh for crying out loud, geez. :roll:

    ***********************************************************

    She’s a fcuking idiot. Just ignore it.

  • sharon

    I love Jon Stewart’s joke about Angie. It is hilarious.

  • malibumom alter ego

    BTW, Fellinelily is wooden legs.

    Go to the previous thread and discover for yourself how she outed herself.

  • Alexanderina

    isn’t is funny that when you don’t agree with someone on here you are call a troll. Some people on here need to get a f*cking life.

  • alicia

    I wonder what happened at the pre-oscar bash yesterday b/t the Jolie-Pitts and Maniston. I hope Lainey has some juicy gossip.

    Since they’re all anyone can talk about I bet Brad and Angie were holding court the whole time while Maniston sulked in a corner.

  • bella

    Brad with Jimmy Kimmel really where can I see in what day wich show

  • CLINIQUA

    I’m done with you.

    ___________________________

    Yeahhhhhhhhhh!!! Yipppee!!!! A person who I didn’t even know was ALIVE before she started f**king with me tonight on the heels of the other Aniston defender (primarily because she makes NO f**king impression, is lame, boring and dumb as sh*t) is “done with me.”

    That’s great.

    But er, since I don’t even know who the f*ck you are, have never even talked or had a discussion with you EVER – primarly because you are a dullard that makes no impression on people…please explain how that is supposed to affect me how?? You dumb b*tch.

    Go back into your hole.

  • bella

    when did this air?
    ——————————————————————————————–

    PINKY JP @ 02/25/2008 at 12:46 am Watched Jimmy Kimmel live and there was a video revenge on his girlfriend Sara Siverman that featured Brad as the Fedex guy…hilarious!

  • jamie

    As someone else who’s been called a troll on this blog, I do want to say thanks to all of you regulars who’ve spoken out. Sometimes it feels like everyone on here is of one mind, so it’s nice to know that those of us who are turned off aren’t the only ones.

    Back to Angelina. It still amuses me that the tabs made such a big deal about the pre-Oscar showdown. Brad and Angie aren’t exactly known as huge partiers and add in that she’s both pregnant and had to go to a ceremony earlier in the day, I can’t believe anyone thought she would show. Even Angie needs a break from the 4-inch heels.

  • alicia

    ^^^^ Brad isn’t going to be on Jimmy Kimmel, he was featured in a spoof video, it’ll probably be on youtube by tomorrow

  • dianad1968

    I am going to give my 2 cents about all the drama, and then go to bed. Cliniqua is passionate, she does not like Maniston. If you dont like that she blasts her at every opportunity, dont read her posts. No need to start a feud. Other people make fun of x all the time, and i dont read them getting a beat down. I hate it when i read who i am assuming are all JP fans getting into fights with each other. I am a devoted fan, and i appreciate that there is someone like Cliniqua who will give the haters hell each and every time, because the c**p that is constantly said about Brad and Angie gets ridiculous.
    Now i will say adios until tomorrow. Play nice now.

  • MICRO

    Julianne, Jill -

    Everybody has a different way of handling the troll. For me, as long as there are posters like bet/sam or wooden legs posting agains this family, I will forever bring X in.

  • Mr and Mrs Smith

    Jill @ 02/25/2008 at 12:51 am

    She’s a fcuking idiot. Just ignore it.
    _______________________________________

    Seriously, it’s like ENOUGH ALREADY. I’ll do like you said and just ignore.

  • dianad1968

    alicia, i thought it was Brad, but i wasn’t sure. It was Hilarious. Harrison Ford, Don Cheadle, Cameron Diaz, Robin Williams were among some of the celebrities. I hope somebody puts it on YouTube.

  • nothing but tab lies

    alicia @ 02/25/2008 at 12:56 am

    Brad and Angie did not go to that crappy affair.

    The Showdown That Never Was

    Anyone who was hoping to see a smackdown between Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt’s ex Jennifer Aniston at the Night Before party last night was let down when Brangelina decided to attend the Independent Spirit awards instead. Jennifer was at the Beverly Hills Hotel for the star-studded Night Before party, which benefitted the Motion Picture Television Fund. The party was also attended by A-listers George Clooney — without girlfriend Sara Larson — Seal and Heidi Klum, and Jake Gyllenhaal. But the Friends star left after just an hour and headed back to a private bungalow at the hotel.

    The party, at the Beverly Hills Hotel’s exclusive 1912 bar, was the hot pre-Oscar party in town. Two men were even arrested trying to get in using fake credentials and were taken away in handcuffs.

    The Jolie-Aniston face-off wasn’t the only awkward Hollywood run-in that was avoided. Yesterday morning, Tom Cruise, Katie Holmes and Suri Cruise had breakfast at the posh Polo Lounge in the Beverly Hills Hotel, narrowly missing Tom’s ex-wife Nicole Kidman, who showed up for a business lunch with mega-producer Harvey Weinstein. The two are rumored to be working on a movie project together. Tom wasn’t the only ex pregnant Nicole missed. Later in the evening, her former boyfriend Steve Bing dropped by the Polo Lounge and joined a large party in the front of the lounge.

    Also in the Polo Lounge were designer Roberto Cavalli, who stopped by PageSix.com’s table to say hello, producer Brian Grazer and Russell Simmons. Christina Applegate enjoyed a cigarette outside with a friend. Around 11 p.m., new parents Nicole Richie, wearing a short black skirt and her hair up in a messy ponytail, and Joel Madden arrived and were escorted by security who took them both into the men’s restroom — together. Despite the rainy weather, the pair then headed outside to a private table under heat lamps.

    Partygoers didn’t just rub elbows with Hollywood’s most powerful, including Steven Spielberg and Jeffrey Katzenberg, but also left with a pricey gift bag fit for Hollywood’s elite. Attendees were asked their shoe size and then were given custom designer tennis shoes. They also received loads of high-end cosmetics, and played a MAC Cosmetics trivia game. The winners received a $2,000 laptop.

    Although the party was abuzz and the Polo Lounge was hopping with famous faces, not everyone thought it was the hottest ticket in town. As Elton John left out the back entrance with an entourage, he told PageSix.com, “My party is better.”

    http://www.pagesix.com/story/showdown+never+was

  • Just stop pleasE

    I don’t know why you all are getting CLINIQUA started, just leave it, it being the situation, alone she cool down in a minute. It has been awhile for her.

  • CLINIQUA

    Jill, and Julianne are posting as their own supporters – loving the originality of the names none of us have ever seen before tonight ladies.

    Next all the suddenly ‘new,’ posters chiming in to jump on Cliniqua’s head (with the exception of dumb azz alexanderina who long ago attacked me for being popular), will pipe up about how they are ‘regulars.’

    Regulars, but cowards who won’t use their real names or Jill having a party by herself??? It could go either way.

    Both scenarios are the height of pathetic. But also symbolic of lily livered do nothing so-called fans (trolls), who would much rather attack the righteous fans of the JPs, than see maniston dissed in any way.

  • Jill

    MICRO @ 02/25/2008 at 1:00 am
    Julianne, Jill -
    Everybody has a different way of handling the troll. For me, as long as there are posters like bet/sam or wooden legs posting agains this family, I will forever bring X in.
    *************************************************************

    Micro, there is a big difference between you and Cliniqua in the way you handle yourself on this blog. You don’t get nasty and offensive when other people disagree with you.

    I don’t think bet is sam. Sam is reasonably literate. bet writes like she never passed the third grade.

    As for Woody, I don’t know who she is, but only an idiot like malibu mom alter ego would think she is Felinelilly.

  • oh

    CLINIQUA

    why do you love the Brangelina family?

    you love their generosity? compassion? loving? tolerant? sacrificial? try to make the world a better place? peacefulness?

    After reading your post, I see you share none of their values, possess none of their characteristics. In fact, I think you are the opposite.

    It is very amusing to me that someone like you call yourself a fan.

  • BAfan

    ??????? @ 02/24/2008 at 11:52 pm
    ___________
    awesome post

  • thekookoflove1365

    Hello everyone,

    Posters here at JJ come from different socio=economic background. Hence, deterrence in opinion will arise. Since I am assuming that we are all gown and mature people, we should just AGREE TO DISAGREE. I believe in freedom of expression-in all forms!
    JMO. Please don’t bite my head off!

    “I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your rght to say it.”-Voltaire

    On this note Mahalo ang go-night everyone. tomorrow is another day!

  • ppl who tlk about x are trolls

    If Jill, and Julianne made no impression on CLINIQUA (like she’s said over & over again) and their so irrelevant, why does she continue to post about them? can someone answer that for me please

  • PINKY JP

    Let’s learn from our idols Brad and Angelina…when did they ever make X relevant? A couple of interviews mentioning or slightly referring to her…and that was it. Brangie have moved on and lived happily ever after…why can’t we do the same? More importantly, their passion is not on defending themselves from the attacks from ignoramuses out there including Donald Trump, but it is on loving and making their family stronger AND THIS WORLD A BETTER PLACE. TRUE JP FANS REPRESENT LOVEly BAMPZS(+1 or 2) BY LOVING AND GIVING LOVE.

  • thekookoflove1365

    s/b grown up not gown

    damn this laptop is pissing me off.

  • krung krung

    i love the JS joke, cute.

  • Tracy

    Freedom of speech doesn’t extend to someone else’s blog. No one has the right to come on here and treat people like crap and she does it all the time.

  • Alexanderina

    # 168 CLINIQUA @ 02/25/2008 at 1:07 am

    You are callng me a dumb arse and who attacked you for been popular, oh b*tch please, you think way to highly of yourself, I don’t give a f*ck about you, I look at you as nothing but a crazy psycho bitch, who is way to obsess with the Jolie-Pitts and Aniston. I see your stupid long arse posts and I LMAO cause they are full of sh*t just like you. Now I am done with your crazy psycho arse

  • johnmayERJ81

    cliniquas just mad that thing on her head she thought was a crown was nothing more than a ball of sh*t

  • CLINIQUA

    Hi oh, I’m really happy that I “amuse,” you – I aim to please you silly b*tch! :-D By the way – news bulletin: It “amuses,” me that you are wasting your time on a celebrity message board, and calling YOURSELF a fan of Brangelina, as that does not exemplify filling your head with important things that matter, as they encourage.

    Yet here you and I are, “oh,” — we are such bad fans don’t you think…?? But hey..let’s say you and I “amuse,” each other at the utter incongruity of two silly b*tches posting about nothing on celeb gossip boards in the middle of the night, who support righteous compassionate humanitarians working hard to save the world who THANKFULLY, do NOT do the silly ass sh*t we do, eh?

    That’s my way of saying, you are one phony sanctified superior than thou idiot, “oh.”

    Take a look in the mirror babe.

  • raspberry

    http://www.courant.com/entertainment/celebrity/hc-oscarfash.artfeb25,0,2869086.story

    An article about the lack-luster Oscars this year.

    Best quote: It was a night that made one miss the glamour of an Angelina Jolie.

  • angie fan

    The jenloonies finally succeeded in creating havoc and disunity among the fans. I cannot understand why the jp fans would even defend the trolls agains a loyal fan like CLINIQUA. I would rather bash the trolls.

  • HUH???

    angie fan @ 02/25/2008 at 1:22 am The jenloonies finally succeeded in creating havoc and disunity among the fans. I cannot understand why the jp fans would even defend the trolls agains a loyal fan like CLINIQUA. I would rather bash the trolls.

    ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

    Cant you read? A so called fan who’s really manistons biggest crazed fan started the disunity by insulting jp fans.

  • Tracy

    I can’t understand why Clinqua continually bites the heads off of people who’ve said nothing against Brad or Angelina. If there’s anyone who bashes fans, it’s her.

  • CLINIQUA

    Alexanderina – you’ve been up my azz for years. You bore me b*tch.

    I’m lovin’ all the new scrennames.

    Thanks diana, and others who support me, and if not me, at least the freedom to live and let live.

    Advice, you want to not get called a stupid c*nt by Cliniqua??

    Leave me the f*ck alone, and don’t concern yourself with what I post or how I post.

    Treat me as I treat you – boring b*tches who I could give a f*ck about, and who I wouldn’t know if I cyber tripped over you, let alone say I had EVER in life read a post of yours before tonight.

    I’m sorry you jealous idiots are mad that you are more obsessed with what I do, and what I say than I will ever be about you.

    But those are just the f**king breaks when you’re a boring azz’d b*tch with NO flava.

    Okay, Alexanderina and the rest Jill and whatsername??

  • JunoFirst

    newbie @ 02/24/2008 at 10:53 pm Jon Stewart really is a sweetie. He totally stuck up for Angie here. She was snubbed, and he gave her an award. I love him.
    —-
    I watched the Oscars, and I agree, that it was JS way of bringing Angie up, because had A Mighty Heart been a contender, AJ should have been a nom for best actress. However, if my memory served correctly, there was a discussion in an old thread here in JJ’s that because AMH was shown on a particular time, it will not qualify to be a contender for the Oscars, why exactly, I couldn’t quite comprehend, except for some crazy ruling. Am sure somebody can elaborate on this matter. Anyone??

    dawn @ 02/25/2008 at 12:15 am Why isn’t anyone questioning if NK people corrected Jon Stewart and that is why he had do a second joke?
    After he said that joke, I actually thought that JS forgot one more person – Halle Berry! There were these 2 guys fighting to be her, that was kinda funny. But I doubt that was the case. Just the same, it’s best to just take it as it comes…. the joke was cute and funny IMO. :mrgreen:

  • jjoy

    i hate to the max that b*tch X but i got tired of having her name mentioned on every jolie-pitt’s threads….i admire your passion for defending Angie to the TRUE trolls Cliniqua but it’s getting too much….

    you diss and call names anyone who disagrees w/ your theory of the almighty Huvane and the X…

    every post you make…you cannot complete it without giving a dig of hate against the X and you always claim that she’s so irrelevant but the result of your harping is the reverse….

    you…are…making…her…relevant!!

    so please stop mentioning her and being bully to others who disagree w/ you…

    and now count me as one of the trolls and call me names as usual but hey…i’m tired of you’re harping and yelling…okay…

  • releka

    Cliniqua is tame compared to all the other blogs that hate on Brad, Angelina and the family. You can pick on her all you want, she is Rebecca of Sunbrook farm compared to female first. I love reading her posts. Tell everyone hating on all these blogs to move on and I am sure she won’t mention Brad’s X.

  • Mr and Mrs Smith

    angie fan @ 02/25/2008 at 1:22 am

    ________________________________________

    No one is defending the trolls, it’s just offputting to see the way Cliniqua attacks other fans so viciously. She could have disagreed in a better way than going on an all out attack on them. I’m sorry, but they don’t deserve that. We as fans of the JPs all have different opinions on some things, it’s just the way you go about disagreeing with people that makes a difference. JMO

  • CLINIQUA

    http://www.courant.com/entertainment/celebrity/hc-oscarfash.artfeb25,0,2869086.story

    An article about the lack-luster Oscars this year.

    Best quote: It was a night that made one miss the glamour of an Angelina Jolie.
    _______________________________

    OMG, this is beautiful. LOLOL

  • Alexanderina

    ROTFMFAO and like I said before crazy psycho b*tch

    Anyhoo it is 10:30PM here got to go. Good Night All

  • Andrómeda

    fans, please no fight

  • FYI

    Jill is the only JP’s fans who can’t avoid herself from going to JA’s thread.so how can someone like Jill who posts on one month’s old JA’s thread tell someone to stop talking about JA?and she herself take everything too serious to tell someone calm down.

    Jill is JA’s fan and she is the one who live in JA’s thread more than her fan.

  • mentalCLINIQUA

    Julianne @ 02/24/2008 at 11:30 pm Here we are – not four pages into a thread and we are already putting the X into the equation. Are there no other actresses that you can think of who aren’t so good at their craft, or is that a title only reserved for the X?

    I think she is totally irrelevant, but when her name keeps popping up on threads that have nothing to do with her, she stays relevant.

    Wow….Diablo Cody won for Juno! Good for her!

    Back to lurking. You guys have fun keeping the person you hate relevant! Wasted energy on such hate for someone you don’t know and will never know you. Guess we have to stay true to the roles that have been carved out for us at JJ’s. Bad azzzzzes that would probably scare the bejeebers out of the couple that we all admire so much. It’s funny when you think about it, this peace loving couple with rabid like fans when it comes to the X.

    ABOVE WAS JULIANNE’S POST with no specific mention of anyone and guess who replied with wrath BITCHING at fellow JP fans because she wants us to believe they are what she calls trolls? Your educated guess is as good as mine.

  • CLINIQUA

    yes jjoy, if it weren’t for me snarking on maniston, the tabloids and rags wouldn’t attack Angelina, and call her a homewrecker, and a cheater and an adulterous – why if it weren’t for there would be no female first.

    Hello, anyone home?

    by the way who are you again? I don’t recall any of your posts.

  • http://msn gena

    Read on JJB that Brad was on Jimmy Kimmel live that he did a skit delivering something. Did anyone see it.
    Thought the Oscars were boring, Jon Stewart is not funny. Something was missing.

  • isla

    CLINIQUA – Can you post one comment without a hundred insults or profanities in it? Can’t you think of anything better to do than insult people you have never met?

  • CLINIQUA

    mentalCLINIQUA @ 02/25/2008 at 1:38 am
    _________________________

    Oh damn b*tch. can you BE any more obvious. hahahahaha! Your egomaniacal posting is recognizable ANYf**kingwhere.

    One thing I’m not is a coward. I will say sh*t DIRECTLY to your face.

    You disappoint me – I mean I know your a blowhard and a f**king half, I really had no idea you were scared as sh*t of me.

    This has made my f**king night!!

    Whooooohooo!

    now bugger off.

  • Jill

    FYI @ 02/25/2008 at 1:34 am

    Honey, if you’ve read my posts on Aniston and still think I’m a fan of hers, you are either dangerously deluded or severely retarded. Toss a coin.

  • Brad is a hot fedex guy
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