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John Mayer Speaks From the Heart

John Mayer Speaks From the Heart

John Mayer blogged one of his more well thought out entries, telling others to feel good about themselves and be kind to others. Here’s what the 30-year-old musician had to say:

“I need to write this.

I’ve been traveling alone in Japan for the better part of three weeks now, and It’s been so remarkable an experience for me that I can’t book a ticket home yet. I haven’t spoken very much out loud these days, but I’ve been thinking to myself in what feels like surround sound. I can see so many things clearly, and feel so connected to myself and the world around me that I need to share the perspective with you.

I’m already aware that when I sing, say or write anything, 50 percent of the response will be in support of it and the other 50 will want to discount it. This blog, though, is directed to 100 percent of people reading it. If my blog truly does have any cultural effect, then it should be used for more than just pictures of sneakers and funny youtube videos. (If you don’t think my blog has any effect, than you can’t by definition be reading this right now and therefore don’t have to respond to it in any way. Isn’t that tidy?)

What I’m about to write isn’t about fame or success or celebrity or the media. That’s my business.

This is about us all.

This is about a level of self consciousness so high in my generation, that it’s actually toxic.

This is about the girl in her bedroom who poses in front of the camera she’s awkwardly holding in her outstretched hand. She’ll take a hundred photos until coming up with one she’s happy with, which inevitably looks nothing like her, and after she’s done poring over images of herself, will post one on her myspace page and then write something like ” I don’t give a f*** what you think about me.”

This is about the person trying out for American Idol, who while going off about how confident they are that they were born ready to sing in front of the world, are trembling so badly they can hardly breathe.

This is about me, the guy who walks through a throng of photographers into a restaurant like he’s Paul Newman, but who leaves a “reject” pile of clothes in his closet so high that his cleaning lady can’t figure out how one man can step into so many pairs of pants in a week.

This is about a young guy who maintains a celebrity blog that subsists on tearing other people down but who has wrestled with a lifelong battle for acceptance as a gay man.

This is about us all. Every one of us. Who all seem to know deep down that it’s incredibly hard to be alive and interact with the world around us but will try and cover it up at any cost. For as badass and unaffected as we try to come off, we’re all just one sentence away from being brought to the edge of tears, if only it was worded right. And I don’t want to act immune to that anymore. I took the biggest detour from myself over the past year, since I decided that I wasn’t going to care about what people thought about me. I got to the point where I had so much padding on that, sure, I couldn’t feel the negativity, but that’s because I couldn’t feel much of anything. And I think I’m done with that.

I’m not the first person to admit we’re all self conscious, Kanye [West] was. But what I want to do is to shed a little light on why we’re all in the same boat, no matter the shape of the life we lead: because every one of us were told since birth that we were special. We were spoken to by name through a television. We were promised we could be anything that we wanted to be, if only we believed it and then, faster than we saw coming, we were set loose into the world to shake hands with the millions of other people who were told the exact same thing.

And really? Really? It turns out we’re just not all that special, when you break it down. Beautifully unspectacular, actually. And that truth is going to catch up with us whether we want to run from it or not. The paparazzo following me to the gym ain’t gonna be Herb Ritts and the guy he’s following ain’t gonna be Bob Dylan. It’s just a matter of how old you are once you embrace that fact. And for me, 30 sounds about right.

What now, then? I can only really say for myself: Enjoy who I am, the talents and the liabilities. Stop acting careless. In fact, care more. Be vulnerable but stay away from where it hurts. Read. See more shows. Of any kind. Rock shows, art shows, boat shows. Create more art. Wear hoodies to dinner. Carry a notebook and hand it to people when they passionately recommend something and ask them to write it down for me.

Root for others.

Give more and expect the same in return, but over time.

Act nervous when I’m nervous, puzzled when I don’t know what the hell to do, and smile when it all goes my way. And never in any other order than that.

And when it’s all over, whether at the end of this fabulous career or of this life, which I hope takes place at the same time, I should look back and say that I had it good and I made the most of it while I was able. And so should you.

I’m going quiet now.


Just Jared on Facebook
Photos: L. Gallo/ WENN
Posted to: John Mayer

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  • jelesa

    ♥ 1st

  • lily

    Johnny boy needs to realise that no one is interested in his long rantings because it AIN’T THAT SERIOUS


    That was nice to read

  • Rebel
  • samara

    He feels he need to share something thats on his heart ,and he isnt being negative to anyone

  • ADD

    lily @ 03/28/2008 at 4:50 pm
    Then why the hell are you posting about it dumb ass! Oh I get it… You’re ADD! The reason why you don’t like long postings is because you can’t pay attention long enough to understand what you’re reading!!!

    LOL…. Ok, feel better now after writing that… Now I’ll start putting it into practice. Good one John :)

  • Malia

    That was really nice.

    Every young person who is in the entertainment business and who is followed around by the paparazzi should read those words and try to live by them.

    Good advice.

  • Melissa

    thanks, John Mayer. It’s not like those of use who aren’t celebrities haven’t already figured this out by the time we’re 18.

  • damn

    That was deep… he really wrote his heart out in this one! Very nice, thanks for the advice John…

  • A Logical Person

    A good piece, but sadly, a lot of people won’t bother to read it.


    Because they don’t want to take the time. Or their reading skills are not up to the level of this writing style.

    And, you know what? Those are the people who will critique the piece and say it’s no good. The very people who SHOULD read it will not.

  • katie

    that was sweet, im glad i took the time to read it.

    nice to see a celebrity telling the truth instead of trying to pretend they’re god.

    he seems like a really smart guy, without being patronizing.

    good for him

  • Erica

    very real and such an honest observation of human lives…
    i respct John MAyer as an artist and now i’m seeing that he seems to be a grounded and decent human being as well…
    I hope he stays on the right track as his artistry is really a big gift and he also comes up with inspiring music…he’s brilliant in my opinion…

  • lila1984

    john mayer’s B.RI.L.L.I.A.N.T

  • [☆F a m o u s☆]


    obviously everyone’s interested in his long ranting’s because everyone’s always paying attention to them. lol every blog blogs about mayer’s blogging.

  • troy

    It was very nicely said. Not bad for a guy who once promised an eighty-part series on the origin and meaning of the word “douchebag.” LOL

  • Arab.Aquarius

    I agree with at all. He hit the nail on the head.

  • Ally

    John Mayer is relevant because….?

    No seriously, how is he relevant? Your Body is a Wonderland sounds like it came straight out of ’96 and should stay there. Why’s he still around?

  • diana

    He wrote this very well. I actually didn’t feel like reading it but it was good.

  • !

    Beautiful words.
    I really like John Mayer.

  • Frida

    I think John Mayer must be one of the smartest celebrities out there.

  • sue

    He seems very sweet and funny too. Can’t wait for his new CD, I love his music.

  • Sarah

    Wow, nice to see at the dawn of thirty I am not the only one who realized this and how it has set me free. Speaking your truth, speak it before it eats you ALIVE!

  • Larissa

    To me, he’s perfect. As a artist, as a person.

  • http://JJ.COM lynn

    John Mayer, You are so becoming a man. You will know what you want in life and will strive for just that peace of mine and still do your wonderful music. I do hope you will find your real true sole mate and live in peace the rest of your life. Please continue to share your wonderful music with the people. Good Luck to you.

  • Brit

    Wow, overall lots of great comments..i’m a HUGE JM fan and I’m so used to seeing the word “douchebag” all throughout the comment section…
    I personally think he is brilliant and his music is a blessing to the industry..but thats just me.
    I’m glad he can be smart and tell how he feels..the part about taking the padding got to me as I’ve had to go through that same process before..
    praise to John, please continue to ignore the “douche” comments, those people don’t even count. the rest of us enjoy your blogging.

  • kris

    This needs not only to be read, but UNDERSTOOD. He put it well…and not everyone realizes this, even those who are in their twenty-somethings and cannot figure out why the world is not theirs yet as they had been promised. We’re all in this together; we all contribute something. No one person can do it all or deserves it all.

  • http://JJ.COM lynn

    Mr Mayer,
    Your world is a lonely place sometime and you cannot always share your thoughts and feeling with a lot of people or the press without them putting spin on it. We the people will always be here when you feel like venting and you will get all the feedback and info that you need to get through this life.

  • Aaaaagh!

    Don’t know where the rest of you are coming from, but he is so full of it, and himself.

    Yes, what he said made sense, but anyone with an ounce of sense could figure this out for themselves.

    The only reason he’s putting it out there on his blog is so that people will keep talking about him and his fame. This was not written for anyone else…

  • Kat

    @lynn 8:35pm—-I really like what you wrote, very nicely stated.
    We need more celebrities like John Mayer, he’s a good guy.

  • q

    To Ally and Aaaaagh!

    First, Ally, have you been living under a rock for the past 7 years since Wonderland came out? Have you not heard his new songs at all? Wonderland was ONE song out of many. Maybe it’s not deep, but you can’t call the man shallow because of one song. I’m trying my best not to assume you’re an idiot from your one post.

    And Aaaaagh,
    You can’t tell me you think you are perfect and don’t suffer from any insecurities whatsoever. Maybe it takes someone a little longer to accept themselves. Someone taking the time to read the blog may feel a little better that even someone whom they admire suffers from insecurities as well. Also, he’s been writing blogs for almost 3 years now and no one talked about them until recently. Maybe they are for himself, maybe it’s therapeutic, but at least his blogs can possibly help someone at the same time.

  • celine

    to the person who commented that goes by the name Ally:
    The value or relevance of a song differs from one person to the other.
    And yes, fyi, john mayer is relevant because as you can see hundreds of people read what he has to say, and quite frankly you’re one of them

    and to Aaaaagh:
    The only person who’s full of him/herself is you.
    You’re so closed minded, people like you insist on seeing only what you want to see, that because he’s an artist all he wants is endless fame and money. Would you react the way you did if you read the exact same entry from a random persons blog? Why can’t you look past that and see that a person fortunate enough to have the opportunity to influence thousands is just trying to speak his mind and attempting to make the world a better place.

  • LoL

    Anyone notice this kind of stuff come up when it’s time for a tour or he is dropping a cd. This brunt out fan is tired of his tricks and publicity stunts. Why not rely on talent unless his talent dried up and trickery is all thats left.
    Tired of his posting and the pr team taking it over. The public is not stupid. It would be nice if he stop looking for the awwww factor and start working on music but Jessica Simpson must have taught him this trick. You know what it hasn’t work for her yet.

  • jess

    i loved that.

  • Mac

    I agree must be time for a tour well he had to pull something after everyone was calling him a douch bag. A douch bag can’t sell to many tickets.

  • Jen

    If it was sincere he could have put all that down in his journal but he knew it would give him pubicity and I think that was his goal.
    We will see when he hit the streets again using hollywood chicks as tools.

  • Beth

    It must be hard for celebrity to sell their goods because more of them are resorting to tricks. I also think it’s a sign of the economy that is making it a dog eat dog world. With some many in the world losing jobs concert tickets or the last thing people will buy. Most will go only for the few top artist let the others go. I think JM people know this so it’s time to change his image.

  • mel

    I see John is going through the soul searching phase……WHO AM I? WHAT AM I? WHAT’S MY PURPOSE ON THIS PLANET, IN THIS LIFE? etc etc. Yeah we’ve all been through that and will continue to.

  • mel

    Oh I also love how he talks about PEREZ without mentioning his name. Perez is toxic that is why I stopped going to that site ages ago, give me Trent anyday, his site is like a lovely summer’s day everyday with so much sunshine and love and happiness. And so is Jared’s site which is why I’m here.

  • Sarah J

    Did he have to write a book-half way through I lost interest.

  • Hal

    I wonder why John always bring him up. If he is so disgusted with perez why bring him up. I think John has a gay crush on perez.

  • Velma

    So why bring Perez name up here. The smart thing to do is not say his name or click on to his site. When you click on to his site he gets more popular. Even to click in and say you hate him makes his site popular. Perez gets the last laugh. I see he is getting tv time soon Perez will be a big hit. I think John Mayer seems to like Perez to so what a sick love triangle between Mayer/fans/Perez. Mayer should stop bringing him into their relationship. Kind of reminds me of a husband cheating on the wife and the wife fighting the mistress when all the husband has to do is stop cheating with the mistress.

  • Ally

    I’ve not q and whoever commented, I am not an idiot but thanks for trying to make some sort of ~*biting*~ remark, lol. I’ve only read one post of yours, and I’m also trying my best to refrain from thinking you are an idiot, since I’ve only read your 1!!!1 post.

    So what? Other songs? What other songs? All I hear is a random assortment of over-emoting jam band crap. Sorry. I commented? That makes him relevant? No, it makes me confused and curious as to why people like you seek to defend anything he says or does, so quickly and vehemently.

    Did I call him shallow? No, so I have no idea what post you’re responding too. But thanks for inventing that little bit.

  • sandy

    The only thing I’ve heard from John Mayer is him dating different celeb chicks, buying things and flasing them. I’m with Ally what songs has he done. Seems like he made wonderland then started running with Jessica Simpson. He has not done any big music lately.
    Why is he posting this has he gotten bust for drugs or dui. I can’t seem to find any sympathy for him at the moment. This is stuff you realize at 18 like someone else said so why does he want big props for it now. I agree he must need the attention to sell tickets or someting.

  • Dee

    I think his career is hype. If he is known for music then why is he not putting out a song in stead of a long blog.

  • cc

    The struggle of a gay man with a reject clothes pile. Got it.

  • Linc

    lily, I think what you’re not getting is that he’s saying not to take things so seriously, but to enjoy them and not to cover up and put up a fascade of who you are. If we’re all walking about being who we really are then we’re going to have a more honest world and people won’t be afraid to tell people how it is, because they just got told five minutes ago.

  • Dee

    q…..Since when someone has to be an idiot because they don’t agree with you. Everybody don’t kiss his toes.

  • kelsey

    Wow, John. You go to dinner wearing a hoodie. What a brave man.

    The few. The strong. The John.

    If only we could have boys like him in Iraq.

  • Ada

    has he come out of the closet is John Mayer saying he is gay?

  • wicked wench

    I think Perez Hilton is supposedly the gay man tearing others down – just my guess.

    I despise his music, but appreciate this blog’s sentiment, although it is a contradiction in terms to announce that one is not special and then talk about affecting global change with one’s blog.

    There’s a duality here that I’m not sure John grasps – a paradoxical truth that involves two propositions:

    1) In the universal perspective of the time/space continuum, each of us is completely irrelevant.

    2) The universal perspective – the space-time continuum – is like a fabric, and like any fabric, a pulled thread will affect the whole. (Quantum Theory)

    Thus we are completely irrelevant and entirely necessary.