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Jennifer & John's Exit Strategy

Jennifer & John's Exit Strategy

Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer attempt a stealthy exit form the Beverly Hills Hotel by driving out the entrance driveway on Saturday.

Later in the evening, Mayer had a few thoughts and scribbled them down on his blog:

“Go back into the annals of beloved ’80s films, and you’d be hard pressed to find a movie closer to the hearts of thirty-somethings than The Goonies. I’ll spare you the synopsis, as you most likely already know it, but if you don’t, no need to worry – you’ve seen 20 other movies like it in its time. The template: nerdy but affable underdog(s) suffer unrelenting ridicule by jocks in varsity letter jackets but ultimately have their comeuppance, usually stealing a smoking hot girlfriend or two in the process.

In the case of The Goonies, a band of awkward, socially outcast kids set off to find a buried treasure, narrowly averting almost certain death and outrunning, among others, a popular high school jock named Troy. Troy is one of the classic cinematic archetypes of the 1980s; the jock. He’s good looking, rocks a period-relative badass Mustang convertible, and he’s a total prick. All we can do from the moment Troy enters the frame is to wait with baited breath to see Troy lose and the Goonies win.

And in that end, back in 1985 when the underdogs had their day, (and their bag of jewels), and the final credits rolled and we called our parents for a ride home, we realized something fantastic: It’s true, we weren’t Troy. But for the first time, thanks to The Goonies, we no longer wanted to be Troy. It was okay to be us, thank you very much.

Cut to present day.

What happened to the better part of a generation that once walked out of their local theater rooting for the Mikeys and Chunks and Datas of the world? They’ve turned into Troys. Troys who can’t accept the differences in others and condemn the things they don’t understand. Finger-pointing, s—-talking Troys.

Ask yourself: with whom do you identify more these days, Troy or the Goonies? And if you’re reading this and you happen to be an Internet s—-talker, could it be because you think I’m Troy? Because honest to God, I’ve always fancied myself a Goonie; the underdog who toppled over the narrow-minded naysayers and walked away with a treasure.

So maybe this whole thing is one big misunderstanding and it turns out we don’t need to go down as a generation remembered as having spent the ’00s wearing our asses like hats after all. Maybe it will turn out that we needed a little time to figure out that in the end we’re all just a bunch of Goonies.”

Just Jared on Facebook
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Credit: Dean/Matei/JRI; Photos: Bauergriffinonline
Posted to: Jennifer Aniston, John Mayer

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  • click

    uhhh NOT reading that long story… thanks anyways jared.

  • http://www.myspace.com jen fan

    First

  • tiffanyxxxx

    First hehe

  • julia

    God He’s annoying.

  • Haven

    Ha yeah neither. I just up to The Goonies and stopped.

  • anime!

    So they went to take the front entrance not to avoid the paps but to make sure the paps were there to take their pics, since its been ages since the last two have been seen in public. Im sure they dont want people to forget that they are seeing each other.

    And why is Jennifer the one who went and see John in the hotel alone, there are pics of her entering the hotel alone, and when she came out, John was already with him. Both of them has houses in LA, why would they want to go to Beverly Hills hotel, when there are lots of paps there??? They are just so predictable!!!

    Anyway I couldnt be bothered with what Mayer is writing in his blog, its all nonsense as usual!

  • http://www.myspace.com jen fan

    Thanks for the new thread Jared!

  • jmfan

    So much for them being over after Cannes.

  • http://www.myspace.com jen fan

    o.k. second. LOL

  • raye

    Whats the purpose of them hiding now, when they have already made sure they were photographed by posing to the paps in a Miami pool, with less clothers that what they have in those pics! Even jennifer made sure she has her arms over Mayer and kiss him to show to the world that they are an item! Aniston is such a drama queen, she and Mayer are both famewh*res!

  • francine

    So what are you saying JJ, they had dinner that evening and afterwards, instead of John having sex with Jennifer he opted to stay in front of his computer and post in his blog??

    Or is he blogging while Jennifer is giving him a BJ???

  • ONMYOWN

    Dear Mr. Meyer,

    Goonies vs. Troy theme is time immemorial. Again nothing new. Contrary to your self perceived underdog, or “Goonies, you are actually a classic Troy – SO OVERRATED.

    Best to scroll down, than read your scatterbrain illogical thinking. If your goal is to impress readers, regretfully, you are failing miserably.

    YOU ARE NOT A CRITICAL THINKER – NOT IN THE VERY LEAST.

  • THks jared

    Thanks JARED!
    i love JA

  • vivien

    What a mismatched pair! It must be tough for John Mayer knowing that he could never measure up to Brad …

  • Lola

    God this man is a boring, self important douche

  • http://msn lips,tits and angie’s angels.

    Now she hiding her face?. She wasn’t hiding it when they were in the pool in Miami.

  • Jaye

    Either this man doesn’t know what a synopsis is or he doesn’t read what he writes. Either way his a long winded idiot.

  • Wut wut

    I’m not surprised some of the fools who frequent this blog couldn’t be bothered to read something longer than two paragraphs. Jared, why don’t you make this an image-only blog? It might appeal to the large Brangelina audience who can’t be bothered to pick up a book unless it has pictures in it!

  • boring

    He’s a joke and by association so is she. I love it.

    BTW the Rolling Stone should have replaced him with Dave Matthews.

  • Dancer

    Why go to the Beverly Hills Hotel, a known pap hang out, if you want to be private? Just asking.

  • jmfan

    I’m pretty sure this was written before he went out dinner with her. The time on his blog is just after 5:30.

  • HELLO!

    Dancer @ 06/01/2008 at 10:22 am

    Why go to the Beverly Hills Hotel, a known pap hang out, if you want to be private? Just asking.

    Too True

  • Wut wut

    Hey Francine, since you couldn’t be bothered to read, I’ll assume you also can’t tell time! John posted this blog BEFORE he went out for dinner with Jen.

  • When Douchebags Blog

    Yeah, John Mayer. Because no one has reason to think you’re a tool unless it’s out of jealousy, right? Please quit writing on your blog forever. If you must jack yourself off, I’d prefer you do it in private. You’re a delusional hack who has gotten a more or less free ride in the music business. STFU and just be grateful that you even have a career – accept that not everyone is going to kiss your ass,

  • Lola

    Most people on here have no clue what JM is blogging about. They also have no clue what ” ignorance is bliss” means.
    Keep on blogging JM.

  • LAF

    Oh, go fly a kite Joh Mayer!!!!

  • When Douchebags Blog

    What a mismatched pair! It must be tough for John Mayer knowing that he could never measure up to Brad …

    —–
    Actually, Mayer is a douche, but he probably more than “measures up” to Brad. I hear Brad has a small one.

  • francine

    # 23 Wut wut @ 06/01/2008 at 10:27 am Hey Francine, since you couldn’t be bothered to read, I’ll assume you also can’t tell time! John posted this blog BEFORE he went out for dinner with Jen.

    *********************************

    hey idiot wiutwut, i never go Mayer’s blog ok and you are the one who cant read! If you open your eyes clearly it was Jared who said, that John and Jennifer got out of the entrance way of the Bev Hills hotel and later in the evening, take not, it said later that evening, Mayer posted in his blog!

  • US voter

    Or is he blogging while Jennifer is giving him a BJ???
    ***********
    lol…..Be nice now.

  • nonsensical john!

    Dude is the most long winded writer ever! I wonder how he randomly picks his topic. He must be a slight cuckoo!

  • Jennifer’s most famous

    Line.
    Wut wut

  • boring

    Diaz took dating him for fun. Aniston, sadly like Simpson, is taking this too seriously. She is so stupid or so needy. Maybe both. But it will be fun to watch.

  • boring

    Dancer @ 06/01/2008 at 10:22 am

    Why go to the Beverly Hills Hotel, a known pap hang out, if you want to be private? Just asking.

    Same reason you go to a public swimming pool.

  • http://www.madonna.com madonna

    DOUCHE!

  • US voter

    Wut wut @ 06/01/2008 at 10:18 am

    I’m not surprised some of the fools who frequent this blog couldn’t be bothered to read something longer than two paragraphs.
    *****************************
    Only a fool would say would you just posted. FOOL!

  • reading is essential

    Later in the evening, Mayer had a few thoughts and scribbled them down on his blog:

  • ONMYOWN

    My dear wut,

    Your reading skills need a major overhaul. Francine, persuasive rebuttal !

    And Mr. Meyer – do you really know what synopsis mean ?

    1. a brief or condensed statement giving a general view or plot of some subject.

    Scatterbrain is the word.

  • Riley

    Had a “few” thoughts? More like 6 paragraphs of thoughts.

  • lizzie

    I love his music, and he is a really fine guitar player. Soo sorry to see he’s become full of himself and a star fucker. Simpson and Aniston are just proof that he dates not so bright and needy women so he can feel smart and superior. I feel really bad about this because he has all the right elements – intelligence, talent and dedication to his craft.

    oh well

  • mary katherine

    These two together make me so happy.They deserve each other to the fullest.They need to stay together for ever.They make a perfect couple.I just love Karma.I wish a picture of John in his green full peice Bathing suit and Jen in her bikini together.Thay would make E.T. News,love these two together.Another vince vaughn but shorter and thinner.Thanks john for taking jennifer we all love you for this.Perfect Couple of 2008 i hope People Mag. vote them the Perfect Couple.

  • Hmm

    So is Brad Troy and Douchebag is Goonies?

  • huh

    Thank you john mayer please keep her.she needs a good man.no need to hide we already saw you guys in pool.

  • huh

    Perfect match please keep her John.

  • ONMYOWN

    TODAY WORD: SCATTERBRAIN

    4 results for: scatterbrain

    Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1) – Cite This Source – Share This
    scat·ter·brain Audio Help /ˈskætərˌbreɪn/ Pronunciation Key – Show Spelled Pronunciation[skat-er-breyn] Pronunciation Key – Show IPA Pronunciation

    –noun a person incapable of serious, connected thought.

    Also, scat·ter·brains.

  • huh

    sheryl crowe thanks, you did a good deed.The best thing for aniston is Mayer they go together Perfect.Best match.

  • sunny

    You got your time wrong Jared. John finished writing in his blog at 5.37 pm. Los Angeles time. The dinner was at night.

  • marviin

    these two are greek .so they should get along good.

  • yes

    they were made for each other.please mayer marry her.you to would be perfect.you two are just alike.

  • Kel

    @Wut wut

    LOL, You are a gem!! Couldn’t have said better myself, that was a good one.

  • http://justjared jennifer fan

    leave her alone they are cute together who cares if they last they are having fun

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