Evan Rachel Wood Recalls Being 'Publicly Gaslit' for Marilyn Manson Abuse Allegations

Evan Rachel Wood is opening up about coming forward allegations against former boyfriend Marilyn Manson.

The Westworld actress appeared on Jameela Jamil‘s I Weigh podcast, where she described the “re-traumatizing” experience of being in a sexual abuse investigation.

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“After being involved in a large investigation like the one I’m involved in now, I really started to understand why people pull out of investigations and why victims recount their statements and why they go forward and then pull back,” she said. “Because man, it’s no joke having to go through the things that have happened to you in excruciating detail. Questions you’ve never been asked. And to have to go back there over and over again, to be publicly gaslit on a large scale or even a small scale, it’s very, very re-traumatizing.”

Evan continued, “I sit here knowing I’m not lying, knowing I’m telling the truth, but people make you feel crazy. So I have to sit there and meditate and go through the things that have happened to me and go, ‘Did this happen to you? Yes. Did this happen? Yes.’ And I go through the details and replay them in my head just so no one can take my truth away from me, because they try, they really try to break you down.”

The True Blood actress first accused Marilyn of sexual assault and abuse in February 2021, leading multiple other woman to come forward with their own allegations. In March, Marilyn launched a lawsuit against Evan for defamation.

Evan went on detail what it was like ending her relationship with Marilyn.

“I was so happy to be out that I just shoved it all down and wanted to forget that it even happened, because the last thing you want to do when you’re finally out of a nightmare is to sit there and study it and relive it for years,” Wood said.” I was like, I just want to go hang out with my friends, I want to go to Disneyland, I want to dance, I want joy again,” she shared.

“I thought I was going to go to my grave with everything that had happened, and I also had not been out long enough to see through all the gaslighting and manipulation and the grooming that had happened,” she added. “I really internalized the things that people had projected onto me like, ‘She’s fucking crazy, what is she doing, what’s wrong with her?’ … I thought I deserved it,” Wood said on the podcast. “I then took that with me into my next relationship, where I felt completely unworthy. I was lucky to have someone take me back after I had been so awful. I didn’t realize I had so much work to do until I tried to have another relationship. I realized intimacy was really hard, I would just close my eyes and disconnect… chronic pain all over my body, I felt 80 years old. I would wake up screaming, or I would have these crazy night terrors or I couldn’t sleep.”

Last month, Evan broke her silence about the lawsuit Marilyn had filed against her.