Top Stories

Amy Schumer Reveals an X-Rated Part of Her Wedding Vows

Amy Schumer Reveals an X-Rated Part of Her Wedding Vows

Amy Schumer is opening up about her surprise wedding to chef Chris Fischer and what she said in her wedding vows!

The 36-year-old I Feel Pretty actress opened up on her pal Nikki Glaser‘s SiriusXM show.

“I’m a wife as hell. But it’s still like, a novelty,” Amy said about married life. “Somebody went to sit next to [Chris] and he’s like, ‘My wife is sitting here,’ and then I got back and he was excited to tell me that he said that. I just have been really overusing it to a degree that’s insane. Like, when it’s completely uncalled for.”

Amy revealed something X-rated that she said during her wedding vows.

“Mine sucked! I thought mine were good, I wrote mine in like, 20 minutes. I was crying when I wrote them, but his blew me out of the water so hard,” Amy said.

Nikki chimed in, “I remember a joke from yours. You go, ‘You make me laugh , you make me smile, you make me feel loved, you make me food.’”

Amy added, “In my vows I go, ‘But I promise I’ll keep going down on you, even though everyone tells me I won’t.’ And his were like, heckling me too. He was like, ‘The other day I lost a tennis match and you called me a f–king loser.’ It was all like, awful sh-t.”

“All his stories about me that were supposed to be endearing were about me screaming at him,” Amy continued. “I just annoy him all day. I’ll be like, ‘Do you want to play a game?’ and he’s like, ‘What?’ And I’m like, ‘Guess how many times I sneezed today?’ And like, that’ll be the game. And he’ll be like, ‘Three.’ And I’ll be like, ‘Don’t remember!’ And he’s like, ‘I’m spending my life with this worthless monster?’”

See more photos from the wedding in the gallery!

Just Jared on Facebook
amy schumer wedding photos chris fischer 01
amy schumer wedding photos chris fischer 02
amy schumer wedding photos chris fischer 03
amy schumer wedding photos chris fischer 04
amy schumer wedding photos chris fischer 05
amy schumer wedding photos chris fischer 06
amy schumer wedding photos chris fischer 07
amy schumer wedding photos chris fischer 08
amy schumer wedding photos chris fischer 09
amy schumer wedding photos chris fischer 10
amy schumer wedding photos chris fischer 11
amy schumer wedding photos chris fischer 12
amy schumer wedding photos chris fischer 13
amy schumer wedding photos chris fischer 14
amy schumer wedding photos chris fischer 15
amy schumer wedding photos chris fischer 16
amy schumer wedding photos chris fischer 17
amy schumer wedding photos chris fischer 18
amy schumer wedding photos chris fischer 19
amy schumer wedding photos chris fischer 20
amy schumer wedding photos chris fischer 21
amy schumer wedding photos chris fischer 22
amy schumer wedding photos chris fischer 23
amy schumer wedding photos chris fischer 24

JJ Links Around The Web

Getty
  • Ariana Grande got tearful while talking about the Manchester bombing - TMZ
  • Joey King spills on what its like to watch her Instagram follower count skyrocket - Just Jared Jr
  • Kylie Jenner just scored her first Vogue cover - TooFab
  • Jennifer Lopez explains on why she's returning to romantic comedy - The Hollywood Reporter
  • KJ Apa opened up about stepping into his The Hate U Give role - Just Jared Jr
  • moody

    Classless

  • Penny

    Divorce in 1.5 years.

  • Dieter from Sprockets

    i feel sorry for him

  • Stephanie Johnson


    Google offers me 98 dollars per hour to complete few task on the laptop . Do job only for few period of time daily and have more time with your family .. You can also do online jobs community!!on Saturday I got a gorgeous Audi Quattro after just getting $19520 last six weeks .it is truly the best work however you can now not forgive yourself if you do not read it.!cf42o:➤➤➤ http://GoogleLiveHighestPaidFreelanceJobs/earn/$97/everyhour… ♥u♥y♥♥q♥♥z♥♥p♥♥♥z♥♥♥a♥s♥♥♥p♥o♥♥d♥v♥♥♥u♥c♥♥♥q♥♥p♥♥q♥a♥u♥♥d♥o♥♥♥a♥p♥♥♥m♥♥s:::::!og693n:nwgdi

  • Casey C

    she’s trash. nobody needs to hear that in vows. personal vows are always cringeworthy at the best of times but that’s just trash